(a dawn serenade)
of love, loss & everything in between; written some time in the past and of recent
spring
written september 2022
how many more days,
or months or years
’til I catch a falling star
don’t walk away after spring
will you wait a little longer?
how many more crumpled sheets
till I finally find the right words
to fill in the gaps
inside my maundering mind
for the way you made me feel,
I could not easily express
yet I long for you to read
these dusty love notes I’ve written
sleeping beneath my bed
waiting and wanting to be read,
yes, read them aloud
for your voice cradles me to dreamland
distance, my joy killer
when will she ever be on my side
I still wait in grief-colored clothes
for the bullet train
that will take me to you
for the meantime
come visit me again in my dreams
desert (reprise)
written july 2022
at dawn, I wake
held by the summer rays
breathless,
I take the morning sun’s kiss
that tastes as bitter
as the April fool’s day
my thoughts and tears
are trapped in this
wilderness of longing
thirst has become my only comfort
I search for your smile
sunk in the golden sand;
the failure to see
what’s not forgotten
bereft me of my senses
I found nothing but lifeless memories
this reminiscence is the grave
I keep digging
to take a hold of what would give me
a fountain of hope;
a new love to water my blossoming tree
until then,
I shall choose
this forlorn desert
over the promising sea
I wait for more
written january 2016
you come like a hurricane
unannounced,
crashing through every
chamber of my heart
a tragedy that befalls my solitude
colliding with my inner ruins
you have awakened
the stillness that has been
long at rest
but I do not question your arrival
the aftermath convulsed my soul,
and left me still with
questions unanswered
everything is falling,
yet I wait for more
by the sea, I write my elegy
written august 2022
the sun sets forth the horizon
with a brief wave
of melancholia
I build a sand castle
to wish upon
I cast these stones in the water
waiting for the ocean’s last roar
its warm breath, I breathe
tasting the salt in my hair
my feet are washed
by the kissing
of the shore and sea
as I walk towards
the mirage of hope
that has led me astray
for months
I have nowhere else to go
I rest my body
in this white expanse
and write
my hundredth elegy
shall I envy the wind
that carried
your broken dreams?
or the spring tide
that swallowed your sorrows?
is there beauty
in loss?
if so,
teach me how to see
my hands are soaked
by these never ending tears
I beseech the sea
to cleanse me
from this disease
of not forgetting
take me to the mountain,
the forest,
or the city
I wish to flee from
this solitude
for in my silence,
my loud thoughts scream
but oh how I
have loved the sea
so much
I couldn’t leave,
help me then bury
these photographs
while I wait
my peaceful
sleep
au-delà
(some time in 2018)
I wish I had known you since then
back when you were exiting,
for then was I too a lost soul,
searching for the same door to open
and come back to the very place
you want to leave
I wish I had seen you back then
when you were walking away
and look into your eyes,
hold your hand and tell you
together, we can
I may not have stopped your tears,
nor healed your shattered heart
but I could’ve cried with you,
be around during your cold nights
as you write your sad songs,
so will I write my broken sonnets
I could’ve told you that we could do it
heal together
forgive together
ease the pain at least
with little laughs
and a gentle touch
and do,
and feel,
all the necessary whatevers
If I had known you since,
you wouldn’t have felt alone
for then, I’ll be beside you
in all seasons
for the rest of your days
If I had known you since then,
you wouldn’t have wanted
to end it all
storm
written june 2020
to him,
her eyes felt like rain
watering every dry portion of his life
to her,
his smile felt like the sun
shining rays of warmth around
her cold-blooded heart
but to others,
they felt like storm
a raging, violent storm
that can destroy the faith
of those who still believe
in love
is it worth it?
for two to be against the world?
selah; 